![]() WHAT THE FUCK?!! Palpatine you dumb shit, stop shooting the lightning! He’s reflecting it back at you! I can’t make him stop!Īnd now he’s dead too! I only have two monsters left! Come on Rodan! His special move is lightning, and he has unlimited power which is nice, and. WHAT? You goddamn traitorous metal fuck! You can’t side with him! That’s against the rules! I don’t know what the rules are exactly, but that’s definitely against them!Īlright so I’m fighting the metal golem with Emperor Palpatine. Oh thank god, a Deus Ex Machina Golem thingy just appeared on the board! He’ll help us even to odds! What?! Don’t you run away from me! Get back here! Face your death with dignity! NOO! He saved Fjcwyz as a JPEG! His sprite is all crusty and fucked up now! You didn’t have to do him like that! Come on Dum Bum, we need to get some hits in!ĭon’t you dare quote DMX at me! You don’t know anything about living in the hood! Shit! This is going really badly! Where did he even get a kaiju-sized can of insecticide from?! Way to go, you useless banana spewing asshole! I seem horribly unprepared for this fight, but I still have a huge advantage in numbers, maybe I can whittle down this demon by throwing them all at him! How dare you insult me! Get him, Will Smith! Hit him with the Bum Rush! Aww yeah!ĭamn it, no! We just lost Will Smith! I’ll use Nonagon next….It’s some kind of banana monster that spits bananas? Oh God this isn’t going well. It seems especially susceptible to Godzilla’s rocket fist. It shoots laser from those, slashes with it’s claw, and has a stronger beam from it’s…stomach-mouth or whatever it is. It’s some beefy weird alien with big spikes on it’s back. Oh *I* was the impostor? I guess that makes sense. Just kill them all and let Godzilla sort ’em out! Well, it doesn’t take a genius to figure this problem out! Do I have to guess which one is the impostor? It’s just 3 tiny astronaut things and they’re not attacking me. There’s not much happening in these levels. He’s like a green dinosaur man, and his special move is that his horn glows, and then it shoots out Dum Dums lollipops. Is this a really cheesy way to play through a stage? Yep. Using the bee “Buzzinga” helps a bit because I can hover over them and spam my stinger attack. It makes things tricky when there’s two of them at once. They both move kinda slow and deal stronger attacks while taking more damage to kill. Two enemy types, a big brawny purple one and a crab-ish living turret thing. I don’t know what the NFG does, it immediately died after I took this screenshot (Sorry.) I picked up a lot more playable characters along the way, and they all have their own intro screens with dumb little catchphrases. It’s great for smacking away all the rocks in this area. His special move is the Bum Rush, where he runs forward and hits something really hard. Will Smith is particularly good for this level type. The missiles pack a punch, but it takes time for it to reload. The Mountains level is more of the same, but with a larger spider-looking enemy with an organic missile launcher of sorts on it’s back. ![]() Their gun has a laser that does a bit more damage, but I can plow through them easily with Godzilla. There’s 2 kinds of alien enemies, jumping little spider things with a weak projectile, and lanky humanoid aliens with a gun. There’s no points meter, because that’s pointless. WHAT? Will Smith?!? And he just joined my playable characters?! How is Will Smith in the game? I thought this was supposed to be scary!Īside from that, there’s not much going on in these desert levels. The board looks….normal, I guess? Ugly colors on these levels tiles. Wait, what? “Aliengs”? “Teh Urf?” What the hell is going on? Just have to blow on it per tradition, and then we’re ready to start! It took a couple years, but now I’ve got it. Hello there! My name is Shane, and today it’s finally here! I’ve used the power of The Law of Attraction to manifest the anomalous NES Godzilla cart at my doorstep. ![]()
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